We've all heard the old adage to assume makes an ass out of you and me.
There are a few things we should all think about before making an assumption.
1 is it safe to assume?
If it's something like, did my barn helper go back and let the horse out of the stable? That's a pretty safe assumption that they did. It's also not anything you want to assume and take for granted so you ask to be certain.
2 what is the assumption I'm making?
Am I assuming I know something going on in someone else's life?
If you're making an assumption about anyone you best do your homework first. Chances are you don't have a clue and if you do, you have to remember there are 3 sides to every story. There is your side, there side, and the truth. By that I mean there is Your Truth, My Truth, and the actual truth.
3 what if
What if the assumption your making is going to hurt someone?
What if you don't know what you think you do. What if that person needs your support or friendship not your judgement?
When we make assumptions about other people and things going on in other people's lives, we're making a judgement. We're making it where it makes us sound like we know better for them than they do and that simply isn't the case.
For example it might be a bad decision for a newly single person to start dating right away. But... That is no ones choice but that persons.
It might be a bad decision to drudge up old flames. Again, No ones choice but that persons. It might be a bad decision to wear shorts in 30 degree weather, still no ones choice but that persons. It might be a bad decision to hop on young horse who isn't broke to ride and take off, but... If that person owns that horse, it's their choice.
My point to all this is you may have a better idea of what you think is best because you have an outside perspective and sometimes that's really important. But.... You have to ask yourself a few questions, why do I care? What's in this for me? Am I making this about me? Is this because I have regret in my own life? Am I genuinely concerned? Do I just want to see them fall so I can harass them about it later?
If you're making an assumption, be careful. If you're making an assumption about someone's life, back off. You can't assume you know what's best for someone. That's called judgement. DON'T judge. That's not your job. That's God's job. He's the one that's going to ask why they did that?
You're job, if you're friends or family with this person is to offer them advice if they'd like it. You support people you care about. You don't judge them. You love them and you protect them but, you don't try to make their decisions for them.
Don't assume to know or understand someone's story without first having had a thorough discussion with them directly.